Thursday, April 28, 2005

Literary Conversations With Mama, Contd.

Mama calls in the evening now. This is because she is pre-menopausal and wakes up at 4AM Middle East Time. Which is 7PM my time. Which is acceptable and good. She called Monday. Here is a snippet of our conversation:
Mama: Hi, Habibti! Are you feeling better?
Me: Yes, much better. Sorry I was so grumpy when we last talked.
Mama: [laughs]
Me: I was depressed about not having a job, and catastrophizing.
Mama: Typical Baba. You were your father, so your father!
Me: Don't say that!
Mama: Don't act like him and I won't say it!
Me: How is Baba?
Mama: He's good. Oh, shut up, shut up, he invited over this guy last night... the one he thought you should marry last year...
Mama: Aiwa, exactly, EW, he was so stupid...
Me: [giggling]
Mama: ...and I thought, how did he think she would like this man?
Me: What did he look like?
Mama: The main problem is, he liked The Da Vinci Code. You know this piece of khara book?
Me: Of course. Did you read it?
Mama: I tried, I swear by Allah, I read the first half and tried to finish. I kept reading and reading and hoping it would get better. But it didn't.
Me: So the guy, my long-lost groom?
Mama: He loved the book! He talked about it so much. He thinks it's real!
Me: Uh-uh!
Mama: I swear by the prophet! He said it's a real story! Such bullshit!
Me: What did he say?
Mama: We were sitting at dinner, he brought up the book. I said I tried to read it, and I couldn't. I said I didn't like the quality of the writing. He was very offended.
Me: [giggle]
Mama: He frowned a little and said "this is a true story. Very important to read."
Me: Seriously?
Mama: And your Baba wanted you to marry this person. What did he look like? He was short and not manly looking AT ALL.
Me: Oh my...
Mama: Anyway, he met a girl over the internet and married her.
Me: Does she like The Da Vinci Code?
Mama: Who cares. Let them have little Da Vinci babies and die. Oh! I forgot to tell you, I got a massage!
Me: Did you love it?
Mama: I felt so much better afterwards.

*Earlier literary conversations with Mama here.

Wednesday, April 27, 2005

Mapping Literary NYC

Randy Cohen, in a NYT essay, asks readers to send in their favorite literary chaaracters' haunts and houses. Send mail to

Tuesday, April 26, 2005


This blog began in February 2004. It went off several times, or, I should say, I deleted it several times, most notably if it came up on Google when you entered my name. The reason for this was my inability to allow strangers and, possibly, family members to read about my sex life. Now, I just don't care.

I have archived many of my old posts, in the Old News section in the sidebar. Feel free to peruse them and read all about my debauched night life in '04. These posts include the one about my trip to Cairo, on which I met the fabulous Ahmad Aidy; my early AM Rushdie phone call with my mom; a play about easter and the single mom; thoughts on Muslim Friendster; the Fat Chick Nod, and many others.

And stand by for more debauchery...